awe·some·ness: def. 1. being paid to have fun

So my day today WAS pretty great:

This morning I show up at the museum to begin my training. I walk in the door, and my new manager shoves a map of the museum in my hand, gestures to the elevators and says, "I want you to spend the next two-ish hours touring the four floors of the museum. Start at the top and work your way down. Have fun, and come find me when you're finished."

:D

Don't mind if I do.

Did I enjoy myself? Why yes, I did. My favorite floor, you ask?

Floor #3: The History of Wisconsin.

-The History of Wisconsin: Daily Living section has a replicated clothes iron from the 1940s that you can hold. Can I just say this: the women of the 40s must've had muscles like POPEYE after using that insanely heavy, ridiculous thing all day. In their place, I would've chucked it out the window and said, "Hubby, kids, your clothes are going to be wrinkled. Get over it." Ladies of the 40s, you rock.

-Nearby in a different section they have a life-size touch/sit/play-inside-of-me tractor, complete with all the gears and knobs. Did I press every knob and pull every gear? Why of COURSE I did, silly.
 
So after spending one-and-a-half hours playing, I finally did finish and return to the main floor, where I learned from my supervisor the ins and outs of the gift shop, supply areas and display cases, memorizing relevant facts and important security tips. For instance:

-If I were to accidentally hit any one of the three conveniently located panic buttons behind the gift shop counter, within 60 seconds four Capitol Square law enforcement officers would burst through the doors with guns drawn. Coincidentally, these men who guard Madison's Capitol Building and its surrounding businesses do not appreciate false alarms. AT ALL.

 -Also: the giant window display on the front of the building is an entirely separate section of the building, accessed by a heavy, ancient door on the side of the building. The door happens to be located in a wind tunnel created by the Capitol Square. So if, say, I were to go in to replace the display, didn't happen to prop the door open and it were to shut while I'm inside, it'd be impossible to open from the inside of the display. I would then (apparently) be forced to frantically mime and gesticulate to passersby on the street, until one of them notices me, interprets my crude communication, takes pity, spends their valuable time going inside the museum and tells a staffer that there's a crazy person stuck inside the front display window.

Good to know.

(Read this article if you're curious to discover why Madison's city council voted in 2009 to designate the lawn flamingo as Madison's official bird.)