victory is MINE...

For all you fellow West Wing fans: Friday afternoon at work I was able to legitimately bust out with one of my favorite quotes: "Victory is mine...I drink from the keg of GLORY." I'd just taken my first phone order ever, and found out I did it correctly from beginning to end. ::fistpump::. Unfortunately, none of my co-workers understood why I was telling them to bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land. I need to find me some kindred spirits around here...

The last few days have been quite the mixed bag, full of awfulness and awesomeness. I've been hit on by a creepy coworker and simultaneously rescued by an awesome one, received a parking ticket then given some excellent advice about how to avoid them permanently, taken a disappointingly abbreviated tour of the capitol yet had the pleasure of creeping on two weddings held in the Assembly Chamber. And this morning I listened to a sermon I hated, yet was treated extremely kindly by total strangers.

But the pinnacle of this mixed bag weekend: this afternoon I got pulled over for running a light while driving home from the grocery store. So there's the awful. The awesome: the cop looked at my info, realized I've only been here two weeks, believed me when I admitted I wasn't paying attention because I'd gotten a little turned around, and let me off with a warning. She also looked at my home address and took it upon herself to give me some safety tips; apparently there's been a lot of break-ins along my street over the past couple weeks.

And then the random hilarious: she looked at me funny when I told her I'd moved here from Michigan. She then handed me the printout of my info; turns out the DMV made a mistake and put in that I'd moved here from Minnesota. "Probably just a typo," she said, "But you probably want to give them a call and get that fixed. I'm looking at you and I'm pretty sure you're not trying to "Bourne" and switch identities or something, but it doesn't look great to have that mistake on your information."

?!?!?!

Oh yes, she DID use "Bourne" as a verb. AND she gave me directions on the quickest route home.

So yep, the cops around here are REALLY cool. :D

awe·some·ness: def. 1. being paid to have fun

So my day today WAS pretty great:

This morning I show up at the museum to begin my training. I walk in the door, and my new manager shoves a map of the museum in my hand, gestures to the elevators and says, "I want you to spend the next two-ish hours touring the four floors of the museum. Start at the top and work your way down. Have fun, and come find me when you're finished."

:D

Don't mind if I do.

Did I enjoy myself? Why yes, I did. My favorite floor, you ask?

Floor #3: The History of Wisconsin.

-The History of Wisconsin: Daily Living section has a replicated clothes iron from the 1940s that you can hold. Can I just say this: the women of the 40s must've had muscles like POPEYE after using that insanely heavy, ridiculous thing all day. In their place, I would've chucked it out the window and said, "Hubby, kids, your clothes are going to be wrinkled. Get over it." Ladies of the 40s, you rock.

-Nearby in a different section they have a life-size touch/sit/play-inside-of-me tractor, complete with all the gears and knobs. Did I press every knob and pull every gear? Why of COURSE I did, silly.
 
So after spending one-and-a-half hours playing, I finally did finish and return to the main floor, where I learned from my supervisor the ins and outs of the gift shop, supply areas and display cases, memorizing relevant facts and important security tips. For instance:

-If I were to accidentally hit any one of the three conveniently located panic buttons behind the gift shop counter, within 60 seconds four Capitol Square law enforcement officers would burst through the doors with guns drawn. Coincidentally, these men who guard Madison's Capitol Building and its surrounding businesses do not appreciate false alarms. AT ALL.

 -Also: the giant window display on the front of the building is an entirely separate section of the building, accessed by a heavy, ancient door on the side of the building. The door happens to be located in a wind tunnel created by the Capitol Square. So if, say, I were to go in to replace the display, didn't happen to prop the door open and it were to shut while I'm inside, it'd be impossible to open from the inside of the display. I would then (apparently) be forced to frantically mime and gesticulate to passersby on the street, until one of them notices me, interprets my crude communication, takes pity, spends their valuable time going inside the museum and tells a staffer that there's a crazy person stuck inside the front display window.

Good to know.

(Read this article if you're curious to discover why Madison's city council voted in 2009 to designate the lawn flamingo as Madison's official bird.)